My guest today is Tracey Tee, Founder of Moms on Mushrooms. Tracey has been an active voice for moms for more than a decade, first co-creating and starring in the nationally touring cult-hit comedy show for moms, The Pump and Dump Show. She simultaneously co-produced the Band of Mothers Podcast and served as co-founder and CEO of The Pump and Dump Show’s umbrella brand, Band of Mothers Media. During her own journey with psilocybin or magic mushrooms, amidst the pandemic, Tracey began to feel called to support moms in a deeper and more meaningful way. In 2022, she launched an online microdosing course created exclusively for moms called M.O.M., “Moms on Mushrooms.”
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[00:00:00] Lorilee Binstock: Welcome, I'm Lorilee Binstock, and this is a Trauma Survivor Thrivers podcast.
Thank you for joining us for the premiere of season five, and I'm proud to announce that we are now part of the Mental Health News Radio Network. This podcast is also available wherever you get your podcasts, but I do suggest checking out Mental Health News Radio Network to find all your podcasts related to mental health.
So let's go ahead and get started. For many, there are just as many lows as there are highs when it comes to parenting. And unfortunately, parental depression is a pervasive problem and a large and growing body of research shows that it is a major risk factor for difficulties in a child's life. One of my favorite topics when it comes to healing is psychedelic, so I am very excited about my First guest of the season to talk about moms on mushrooms.
My guest is Tracey Tee founder of moms on mushrooms. Tracey has been an active voice for moms for more than a decade. First co creating and starring in the nationally touring cult hit comedy show for moms, the pump and dump show. She's simultaneously co produced the band of mothers podcast and served as a co founder and CEO of the pump and dump shows umbrella brand band of mothers media.
During her own journey with psilocybin or magic mushrooms amidst the pandemic, Tracey began to feel called to support moms in a deeper and more meaningful way. In 2022, she launched an online microdosing course created exclusively for moms called MOM, or Moms on Mushrooms. Tracey, thank you so much for your time.
First of all, I want to know, what was it that was calling you, that brought you to the space to create Moms on Mushrooms?
[00:01:58] Tracey Tee: Oh, thank you. Thank you for having me. I am so delighted to be here, um, and talk about this. Uh, what called me? Gosh, that is a long, that is a long sordid tale as most people who come to psychedelics have.
Um, I would say it's probably three things. Um, one, my own spiritual journey and the way that it was progressing and, um, Asking me to go deeper in my own personal healing to my love of plant medicine in general, not even psychedelic plant medicine, but my love of plants and the healing of plants. I've been working with plants for probably a decade, whipping up my own teas, my own tinctures, my own essential oils.
Um, my daughter's very tired of me shoving things down her throat when she's sick, they don't taste great. Um, and so This was a natural calling, probably inevitable and, uh, three would be my deep understanding and admiration for mothers and the, the struggles that moms have, um, in this modern age. And I would say like the modern Western mother in particular, because that's what I am.
And having seen firsthand doing a, a cheeky comedy show called the pump it up show and traveling the country, hearing mother's stories and, and understanding that the comedy that we were putting out on stage was actually bringing moms together and giving them permission to laugh about the things that we all had in common and admit that maybe everything isn't sunshine and rainbows.
And I guess I would say, and number four was, uh, Was the good old COVID in the lockdowns and the grief and loss of losing that business. My, my, my live entertainment business just fell through our fingers in a matter of days after working, you know, blood, sweat, and tears. And every last penny, both of our, my business partner and I, both of our families had to put into the business, um, seeing it rise to, you know, expectations beyond our wildest dreams.
And then watching it crumble like in two weeks and having to lose everything. Um, was a very big palpable loss, as I know many people experienced. And then you add on top of that, like the, the horror of having to like explain what is happening in the country to your child, watching her struggle with online school and just everything that came with it, um, really fast tracked my own spiritual awakening.
And, um, The little beings of light, these magic mushrooms just showed up and we're like, okay, Trace, we're doing this. And I said, yes. And it, it was, um, best thing I ever did.
[00:04:45] Lorilee Binstock: You know, I, I also microdose, um, but you know, it's funny because a lot of people are like, Oh, there's not enough research out there for it.
And I, I feel like, you know, it, a lot of it's anecdotal. Um, but I feel like that's, that's where it's the most important, right? Because if I'm feeling, because I mean, I struggled, I struggled with trauma and I feel like a lot of parents who struggle with trauma, it's just. It's just, it's, it's so much harder to parent.
It is. It's so much harder to parent and I, I feel like, um, these micro doses have changed my life. I mean, I, prior I was on Zoloft and I was on another, um, uh, medication, uh, SSRI, as well as Adderall. And now I'm not on any of those things. And I really, I really chalk it up to the psychedelics. I feel like I, I don't have to be on this concoction of medications now.
And, and so I feel amazing about it. But what do you, what do you answer? What do you say to those critics who are coming to you like, This is, this is, this is just, this is just, you know, you're just getting high. You're just, or, first of all, yes, you're just getting high, which you don't even notice it, but I'll let you talk about that.
You're not high, or you're trying to numb yourself, which I'll let you get into that.
[00:06:09] Tracey Tee: Yeah, no, I think, like, in terms of Of not enough studies. I mean, listen to your story, right? You were on all these things that you think that you probably really believed that you needed and you probably did need to help manage how you showed up in the world and then you weaned yourself off them and you replace them with one single, you know, or psychedelics, micro doses and small and maybe large journeys inside of that as well.
But you notice yeah. A palpable difference between like who you were then and who you are now and how you showed up then and how you showed up now, how you dealt with things then, how you deal with things now. How many clinical studies do we need to believe you? I choose to believe mothers. I choose to believe you.
I choose to believe the thousands and thousands of people on this planet who have watched their lives like open up like a lotus flower and change before their eyes. I choose to believe them. And if we're all just being duped by a placebo, but we're healing. Okay. I mean, there's enough science to say it's not placebo, right?
We know, we know the, the chemical, you know, the way it reacts in the brain with our neurotransmitters, you know, with serotonin. We know these things to be true, whether or not we have this, you know, thousands and thousands of people doing a clinical study on microdosing, which by the way, would be almost next to impossible.
Because how do you. Do something day after day and account for exact, you know, exactness over everybody, right? Like there's so many quantifiers that go into, um, I would say like successful microdosing. But be that as it may, I think part of this Revolution, the psychedelic renaissance. Um, and certainly what I'm seeing in terms of mothers stepping up and coming to this medicine with this openness and determination to heal, truly heal, to get off this concoction of medicines that they don't even know if it's working or not.
They just know they have to be on them or they don't know how to get off. And then watching people transform, part of this is unlearning what we've been told has to be true scientifically. Now, this is not me going against science. Science is fantastic, but logic is fast, science is slow. And we also have a very massive database of all types of people whose lives have been transformed by psychedelics.
And it just seems like that is enough anecdotal evidence to at least say There's something here. And, um, and that we don't always just need a dude in a white coat telling us how it is and or we don't need someone in a white coat handing us a bottle and saying this is the only path to happiness. And, um, and that is, that's a huge unlearning curve for all of us to entail.
And in terms of numbing out. Part of that unlearning is actually learning the facts about psychedelics, right? Part of that unlearning is dropping these preconceived notions and these judgments of, of what we've been told, that we're all jumping out of buildings, that our brain is dripping out our ears, like being fried like an egg, you know, and that we're numbing out.
And the numbing out part is the funniest to me because if anyone is, if you've microdosed for a week, like there's no question in your mind that the one thing that you are not is numb, not numb, are way present. You are so dropped in. That is the point of the medicine. The point is to open your heart to calm the frenetic.
Um, stories in your brain and to drop in your heart and actually be present in the world, not to push it away. The medicine, it doesn't work like that. So numbing out isn't even in the equation. This is not what, this is not what it is.
[00:10:12] Lorilee Binstock: That's the exact opposite. It's the
[00:10:14] Tracey Tee: exact opposite, but it takes, I mean, we've had decades and decades of misinformation being thrown our way.
And then you add on top of it, the cultural, um, the cultural stigma and the cultural acceptance of mothers. who do numb out, right? Like, that's the one thing moms are allowed to do. Oh, she can have her glass of wine. Oh, wine playdates. Oh, mommy's little helper. Just let her take her, just let her take her Valium with her martini in the afternoon.
Like, she needs a little something, and so we're gonna allow her to have that. We're gonna allow moms to be just like a little sad, because we know it's hard, but no actual, like, Let's get these women back online. Let's let them show up as their majestic magnetic selves. Like, there's not, there hasn't been any of that conversation culturally ever.
And so, our natural inclination is to say, Oh, all these moms are microdosing, they're just escaping their problems. Because that's what we've all been told that we're allowed to do. And it's just not true.
[00:11:11] Lorilee Binstock: It's not true. I mean, even when you do long journeys, like, and you know, the whole idea of, oh, it's, it's addictive or whatever.
I mean, nobody wants to take a large amount of psychedelics every day. I mean, that's just wild. Like, I, you know, it literally drops into, like, Kind of the deepest parts of your soul where you're like, I need to clean out all of, like you said, the noise, the things that people said are that they say are what you're supposed to do.
And instead of tuning in to what you know is true. Um, and that, that, that is really hard when, when I, I see. people reacting about if you want to escape your problems and take ayahuasca or do all this. I'm like, who's this? They're running towards their problems to address them. And I, that's, that's how
[00:12:02] Tracey Tee: I personally feel.
Yeah, I agree. I mean, every time I do a large dose journey and I'm like sitting with my cup of mushrooms, I'm like, what are you doing? Why are you doing? Like, it's so hard. You know, it's exhausting. It's hard. It's deep. Um, now are people using ceremonies right now as sort of an escapism? Probably. Do humans naturally take advantage of anything good that's been given to us?
Always like that is how we're wired. So yeah, I think you're right. I mean, we know that psychedelics, we know that psilocybin specifically is anti addictive. It's not addictive. Like your, your body isn't going to guide you to it, even in the way your body demands that you have a glass of wine at the end of the day.
Right. Um, and then another, and then another, because it wants more. That's not, That's not in the chemical makeup of psilocybin. Um, so we know you're not becoming physically addictive and there is a lot of science around that. Now, mentally addicted, again, that can happen with anything that we work with, right?
It can happen with exercise. It can happen with food. It can happen with sex. It can happen with church. You know, anybody can become men or, you know, like mentally addicted to anything. Um, And so, yeah, I think there's probably a group of people that are hopping from ceremony to ceremony and doing probably more ayahuasca journeys than needed without integrating them and taking the time to work.
But I think that's, um, that's not, that's not the norm. That's the outliers.
[00:13:31] Lorilee Binstock: Well, I wanted to know for you, when did you notice, what, what changes did you notice from your days before microdosing and, and after?
[00:13:43] Tracey Tee: Yeah, um. I would say that the first, you know, within the first few weeks, and I will, I will preface this by saying, um, that I, I already had, like, my own, I call it spiritual practice.
You can call it whatever you want, personal development, religious, whatever. But I had a, I knew where I was going and what I wanted to heal. So that was in place when I started microdosing. And I think it's was helpful because I w I was already giving myself space to have an intentional microdosing practice.
I wasn't just swallowing this back and just being like three days later, why hasn't my life changed? Because it doesn't work like that. Right. So in that, um, in that space, I would say, um, Two of the biggest things were one, I felt like I had space between my thoughts. I felt like I could Sort of zoom out open the top of my brain see all the words forming and then be like, oh girl No, don't let that nope Nope, we're gonna rearrange these a little bit and then let them go out and I found myself being more clear with my words Which led to less reactivity because I was pausing there was space between my reactions and my words coming out of my mouth which led to better communication and I still find that to this day.
It's probably one of my favorite things about me who I am have a history of being incredibly reactive. Um, I am argumentative. I can get in there and Duke it out with people. That's I'm a fiery areas like that's in my nature. And I felt like it really softened that. And, and then the other part is really like softening those frayed edges of motherhood of being a woman of being just Tracey T, our nerves in this, in this world are just, I feel like they're all just a little fried and delicate, right?
And I felt like when I started taking the medicine, all of that just sort of softened. So it just wasn't so edgy all the time, which let me be softer, which let me feel more present because I wasn't just trying to escape everything. I was like, Oh, this isn't so bad. You know, I can sit in traffic. I don't really need to rage, you know, I can play with my kid.
This isn't boring. This is delightful. All right, I'll just do the dishes. Oh, the milk spilled. Okay, I'll clean it up. Like, that's amazing to feel like that and not just feel like everything is against you.
[00:16:04] Lorilee Binstock: Wow. Yes, that's exactly how I feel. That's exactly how I, I mean, I was extremely reactive. I was kind of scary.
I, I, I turned into scary mom as more than I wanted to. Um, I'm not saying that that doesn't happen anymore, but I'm saying that it just doesn't happen all the time. Like you said, the spilled milk, like I would freak out over spilled milk, you know, that whole saying, you know, my, you know, my parents freaked out over spilled milk.
I freaked out over spilled milk. Um, but after it, I didn't anymore. It was just like, okay, well, let's clean it up. And, you know, I, I won't, I'll never forget the day I realized like, Oh, I'm going to go ahead. And, you know, it was, I, I had a big journey with, um, with a sitter I integrated. And I remember the next day I, um, it was snowing.
And so I took my kids out to go sledding and I was like, okay, we're going to go, we're going to go sledding. And, you know, my, my daughter always. Asked me, you want to go, you want to go play with us? And I'm like, no, I'm good. I'm gonna hang out here. Um, but that day I was like, you know, we're working sledding.
And then I really enjoyed it. And it was, I really sat there and I was like, wow, that's so different. Because, you know, I remember my parents didn't play with me. So I didn't feel the need to play with my kids when they asked. Um, but when I did, it was like. Why, why, how was I not doing this before when they asked me and they were just so happy.
I was like, this is this is life changing. That was like the first image that that that I remember from that experience from that experience when I did that big journey and that's what happened. And it was an intentional journey, you know, as a, as a kid, I did it. Also, um, in my teens, but I didn't, you know, I didn't know what I was doing.
I was like, Oh, here's some mushrooms. Here's whatever. Um, but this was the first time I intentionally did it, you know, with a guide, talk to my therapist about it. And it was. It was life changing and so that's that that I that I know, um, worked for me and that's when everything changes like I'm totally on board like you were saying like all the people who get into this space, something life changing happens.
Um, and you started. Now, Mom's on Mushrooms, and I want to know a little bit about that, because you have a course and everything, so could you, could you share what you do?
[00:18:34] Tracey Tee: Yeah, and I just want to applaud you for realizing too, before I go into my self pitch, that um, you know, that How it seems so silly to be like, Oh, well, I just learned to play with my kids and I find that in this space and being in the psychedelic space now for a few years, um, things can get very serious.
Um, and you know, because we're healing, right? So we're, we're talking about our trauma. We're talking about these things. We're trying to change toxic patterns. We're trying to change who we are. Um, but I would also offer that life. In the Western world, in the U. S. right now, is also, like, very serious.
There's not a lot of permission to just be silly and laugh for the sake of being silly and laughing. Like, everything seems like it kind of has a condition attached to it. A lot of things, it's like, oh, I can play with my kids, but I have to capture this on camera. I have to post it and show everyone that I'm playing with my kids.
There's no I feel like in our culture, spontaneity and ease of just like doing something for the sake of doing it because it's freaking fun is falling away. And as mothers, a lot of that pressure falls on our shoulders. And I talked to so many mothers, so many mothers who are just like, I don't. I don't know where my joy went.
I don't know where it went. I don't remember the last time I've actually laughed, you know, a lot of moms who come, come to moms on mushrooms, like they're not smiling. And I think that is just. a culture that's too fast, too hard, too, too expecting, too overstimulating, and too much pressure. And we just, we just stopped going sledding.
[00:20:20] Lorilee Binstock: Yeah.
[00:20:21] Tracey Tee: And it's like a real bummer. It really is. It is. It's, it's no one's fault and it's everyone's fault. Right. And, and if, again, if If doing a journey and taking, let's say, eight hours for yourself to go deep, to open up your heart, to open your mind, to rework some things, brings you to that, like, how is that bad?
How is that bad
[00:20:46] Lorilee Binstock: at all? I think it's bad that it's not well known.
[00:20:49] Tracey Tee: Yeah.
[00:20:49] Lorilee Binstock: Known as it should be.
[00:20:51] Tracey Tee: Exactly. Or judged the way it is. And so, I, yeah, so that's, that's why I started Moms on Mushrooms. Because, um, having done the show, For so long, you know, a lot of our show was after the show where we would take photos and just listen to the stories of mothers and we did this comedy show and we would talk to moms who would say, this is the first time I've been out, out of the house or just out with another friend in years, three years, four years.
Don't even go out. Not even have permission to go out, let alone laugh, right? And or I would, or we'd see women say like, okay, I, I, I got to go out and I came to the show and here's all the text messages from my husband, which are like, where the F are you? The kids are F ing this, like get the F back here.
And we're just like, Oh my gosh. And then stories of loss, stories of children of, of disease, of death, of grief, all everything, you know, Shane and I used to cry ourselves to sleep sometimes after shows, like listening to the stories of women. So when I started healing with this medicine and didn't have the show anymore, What was shown to me is that what the comedy show did to bring mothers together through laughter, we're in a different space now.
After we went through this portal of 2020 and all that, that, that COVID entailed, we're in a different space. And now I truly believe that moms need to come together and we just need to start talking. We need to unlearn the competition and the mistrust of other women. We need to be able to talk to each other.
We need to redefine what community. Actually means in this modern world, a lot of community is on zoom now and that's okay because we don't live in pockets like we used to. And I believe this medicine is just, it's here right now in such a big way to bring us together to recreate that web. And in my little corner of the space, I believe that it's.
It is life changing medicine for mothers who are in deep distress right now. And so the whole point of Moms on Mushrooms is just to be that web that can grow to bring moms together, to create a safe space where You are seen, you are heard, you are held, and if you feel called to work with this medicine, it will be done in a safe container.
You will have access to other people. That's what our three and a half month course is. And you will work with other mothers and you will create your own intentional practice. And in that you will unlearn that this isn't a prescription, that this isn't like. a protocol or a 30 day challenge that it's a co creation and it's a it's a practice that you can have for the rest of your life.
Um, and then we also have a community, like a private membership community. I kind of call it Facebook for moms on shrooms where, uh, it's all off social media and it's just a place with no influencers. It's not me at the helm. There's no gurus. It's just a place for moms to ask questions and learn about this medicine because I don't, you know, yes, there's a lot of science to it.
And yes, there's a lot of science and, and, um, research that should be done, but also it's like, it's not early rocket science. Like once you understand some of the basics, which is why I wrote a second course that's self paced called micro dosing one on one for moms that just sort of explains everything.
Once you get the basics and you know, you're using it safely and intentionally. You can learn from other people and that's like what people do. We learn from each other, right? We listen to each other. We share our own experiences and we make our own sovereign decisions. And so that's what it is. It's, uh, mom is, uh, we have three months.
Beautiful online courses. We have self paced courses, microdosing one on one for moms. I'm just about to launch a journey to ceremony. That's all about preparation, research, um, participating in and integrating a large dose journey for mothers through the lens of being a mom. And then we have a, then we have a, a, a membership, a private community.
[00:24:53] Lorilee Binstock: Oh, wow. That's incredible. Do you, so you're, you're saying now you guys, you're working with mothers for, for larger doses, not necessarily the micro doses. Um,
[00:25:05] Tracey Tee: I'm writing a course to just educate. moms about it. Um, because we don't know what we don't know. Right. And there's a lot of misinformation out there.
And there's a lot of fear, of course, when it comes to being a mom of saying, what do you mean I'm going to take three grams and then hallucinate for five hours? Why, why would I do that? How do I do that? How am I safe? And there's a lot of unsafe practices that are happening out there as this is explode.
So I feel very compelled to just explain things, explain the science, um, and explain how I felt, found my way to start doing journeys in a way that is safe and intentional. And I really just believe, you know, we need to empower ourselves with knowledge. Knowledge is the key. And again, we move so fast in this world that people are just now reading a couple of memes on the gram and then going off and making these big decisions.
And not just with psychedelics, with food they eat, with vacations they take, you know, anything. And, uh, I think we just need to slow down. I mean, Peace! Bye! Psychedelic psilocybin. It's slow medicine. So the course is really geared around that. And yes, long term as mom continues to grow, um, absolutely providing safe, a safe place for mothers to do, to do high dose journeys is, is absolutely a dream.
Um, and we'll get there. We'll get there someday.
[00:26:29] Lorilee Binstock: Well, what is your mission? What do you hope to accomplish in the next few years?
[00:26:34] Tracey Tee: Um, so my My, my vision has always been, um, that we need a million moms to stand behind this medicine. Um, I think when mothers stand behind anything, and we've seen this proven in history, change happens.
And if moms can come out and stand behind this medicine and say, this is healing, this is helpful, this is supportive, this is, we're doing it safe. And we have a million mothers stand behind it all together, proudly, not ashamed. Like. It'll be legal. And also, there will be no war. It'll
[00:27:13] Lorilee Binstock: all be fixed. You know?
Oh my gosh, if that was, if that were, I mean, what a dream. What a dream. What a dream. What a dream. And, and you know, you said millions of moms. Um, next year, I think there are plans to gather millions of moms for the million. millions of moms march. Is that right?
[00:27:31] Tracey Tee: Yes. So, um, my friend, Melissa, our mutual friend, Melissa Lavasani and I co co founded kind of our advocacy, um, branch of mom called Mom M O M millions of moms, um, with the intent to, you know, Melissa Lavasani from the psychedelic medicine coalition is up on the hill in DC doing the Lord's work, like literally talking to politicians, senators, congressmen, congresspeople, um, At the federal level, like demanding that this is paid attention to and demanding.
And what we want is to say, like, look. You want research, we want research, fund the research. Yes. Here we are. We are tired of watching our sisters die by suicide. We are tired of watching our sisters waste away with medicine that is over prescribed and not helpful. We are tired of watching children suffer with mothers who are in severe distress and depression.
We are tired of watching postpartum depression take its toll on entire family units. So please do some research. for mothers and for women. And, um, and here we are standing out saying we are the benefactors of our own research that we've done. And this is the face of someone who is healing. And that's what millions of moms is about.
So we kicked it off at the psychedelic science conference in Denver and this summer and had a gathering of about 250 women outside the Denver convention center to sort of declare. That this is happening and our prayer is that in summer of 2024, we're going to invite all moms and allies of mothers, right?
Dads, grandparents, whoever. Nieces, nephews, we don't care to show up in Washington, D. C. and stand behind this medicine so that we can get our government to see us as humans who deserve healing.
[00:29:25] Lorilee Binstock: I think that's amazing the work that you're doing, the work that Melissa is doing. I mean, I. Uh, you know, I, I, I just share everyone's story, um, when it comes to that, but I feel like this is, this is an amazing, amazing thing because, you know, you, you see, like you were saying you, you, I've seen in the news, the women who have.
And it's really sad to say it's taken their children's lives, taken their, um, attempted to take their lives because of postpartum psychosis, postpartum depression. And I feel like we're not talking about that enough. I know it's a really hard thing to talk about, but you know, these moms are on, you know, who, who, who have been in the news.
We're on Zoloft and I'm, you know, in all of these different medications, SSRIs, and no one's talking about what. Psilocybin, you know, micro doses can do or even big journeys can do. And I think that is such a disservice to moms. And so what you're doing here is, you know, elevating that conversation, getting these, this many moms to, to talk about it, I think is just.
It's incredible. And, you know, I, you're doing God's work as well.
[00:30:35] Tracey Tee: Well, you know, what we're also not talking about is the safe and responsible use of SSRIs, right? Like, I think there's absolutely a place for that medicine. It's been life changing and healing for many, many people. Um, but we are not giving, most doctors are not giving most women.
that I see exit strategies. It's a life. It's take this. You're broken. Take this. It'll help. And there's no discussion of what's underneath the brokenness. Let's get to the car. You know, like what's the root of addiction. Let's not judge the addiction. Let's judge the root. Like, let's get underneath and talk about what got you to this place.
And let's Let's hold you and, and see you and take care of you and use this medicine, whether it's psychedelics or an SSRI, let's use this medicine as a temporary support system to get you through to the other side, which is your best self. And we're not looking at humans in a holistic way right now.
We're looking at them as numbers who are one dimensional with a one size fits all fix. And we're not, we're not saying. We're not saying that this is, this is temporary and I think that's the problem because now we're seeing, you know, mothers again on one if not many SSRIs, you know, Adderall, ADHD medication, a cocktail of things with no clue how, why or when they will ever stop taking it or how it's all working together or even really an empowered space of what it's doing to my body.
[00:32:13] Lorilee Binstock: Yeah, well, I do, I do appreciate you bringing up the, you know, the SSRIs and how they can be helpful and how they can play a role because for me, you know, when I went into treatment, again, I went in for 31 days and I came out, you know, they had me on SSRIs and I think I needed to be on SSRIs in order to put out all the fires, then, and then find, find a way, find that exit strategy, and I think that, um, that, that does need to be discussed, because it was, it was helpful, um, but no one did talk about an exit strategy.
Exit strategy with me. It was kind of like, okay, until my hair started falling. I was like, I need an exit strategy. Until
[00:32:55] Tracey Tee: my hair started falling out! Like, who
[00:32:57] Lorilee Binstock: said that? I mean, come on! I know, I was like, what's happening? Um, and so it's like, this is, this is, this is causing me a little bit more trauma and depression right now.
Um, so yeah, and, and being able to get off of that was just. Life changing and you know, the Adderall, I had been on Adderall since I was 12, 13 years old and to be able to get off of it finally after it was my second big journey off of, um, from psychedelics because I did after my first journey, it was like I was off of the SSRIs and after my second journey, it was I was off of the Adderall and I haven't looked back and I'm like, wow, I can't believe how different my life is because there are some, I couldn't, there are times where I couldn't sleep because I was taking the Adderall.
Um, and it was hard. Like after a few days I would, it was just too much. And so what I love about the microdosing is that it's subperceptual. You don't, you know, I, I, I feel better. I feel like I can be responsive versus reactive and. And still be able to focus. What? That was And your hair's not falling out.
And
[00:34:11] Tracey Tee: my hair's not falling out. I know, I was just like Your hair looks amazing. Yeah, no, it is. It's It is It is miraculous medicine. From where I sit. And it's not for everyone, and it is not a quick fix, it's, it's, it is slow medicine. I think one of the biggest challenges in my community right now is, um, mothers judging themselves according to other people's, um, processes in the way that they're working with the medicine.
And then also, um, being impatient. And that is where support comes in. Because if you feel yourself changing, if you feel yourself saying, I'm going to go from, I was a and now I'm B and you're not supported in that, you're likely not going to go to B because the change is going to be destabilizing not only to you, But to the people around you, if they're not supportive and, um, and so we judge ourselves against these parameters, whether we're not changing fast enough or we're changing too fast, you know, revealing too many feelings.
So I need to go back on my medicine because there's too many feelings happening. There must be something wrong with me. Again, it's all, it's all unique and it's so multilayered. It's multidimensional. We're working with multidimensional medicine. Um, and it is. It takes a lot of unlearning and it takes a lot of patience.
[00:35:43] Lorilee Binstock: Yeah.
[00:35:43] Tracey Tee: Um, And a lot of trust. Yeah. And an open mind.
[00:35:47] Lorilee Binstock: Yeah. Yeah. Cause I feel like if you're just like, Oh, this isn't going to do anything. This is just, you're, you're, you're literally fighting it. I feel like you're really pissed. You know, it's just, it's caught, you know, the, the medicine provides, you know, New neural pathways.
And if you're resistant to that happening, I feel like it's not going to work out for you
[00:36:06] Tracey Tee: and you may not even know you're resistant. I mean, gosh, I mean, I'm, I'm just, I just, you know, my, my best friend who's like an amazing spiritual coach. We talk about, you know, she talks about the spiral and a lot of us talk about a spiral of healing, right?
Like it's not a linear path. And I feel like I just spiraled right back to the beginning of the, of the race. And I'm like, right back, like, dealing with a bunch of stuff that I just haven't uncovered. You know, they haven't like gotten to the root of yet. And so I'm kind of in this hermit y, darker space right now, really looking at myself.
It's not fun and it, it's not easy. It's exhausting. Um, but I'm also. This word, I never really understood it, but I'm like, I'm resourced now, right? I've got a group of friends who can support me. I've got women holding me accountable to myself because they want me to succeed. I've got people who check in on me.
I've got a partner who speaks my same language, who supports and wants me to be better. And I'm very, very blessed with that. Like very, very blessed. Um. And I've given myself permission to, to look at this change, which means Tracey isn't numbing out. Tracey is laying out here in her cabana on this futon, meditating and crying until she gets to the root of it.
And I'm, I'm allowing space in my life to do that. And that is fully supported by a microdosing practice. Um, but it all works together and it's, it's just, it's hard.
[00:37:44] Lorilee Binstock: Wow. Yeah, it's all integrating everything and in having a support system is so important. It's so important So if there are moms who are out there and they're like, well, where do I get this stuff?
Where do I get this stuff? Where do I get this? Not where you know the knowledge that you provide Where do I go?
[00:38:08] Tracey Tee: Um, well, for education, you can go to moms on mushrooms. com and we got you. Um, and you, you know, if you feel like a course is calling to you, then we have you fill out an intake form and then you have a free discovery call.
So we have an actual person to person conversation to make sure that like walking into this is a good fit for you. Um, if you just want. If you're just, if you tried to Google psilocybin and got real scared or tried to follow hashtag psilocybin on Instagram, which is a terrible idea, um, or microdosing even, and you're just like, uh, no, um, we have a course for that.
It's 40 bucks. I think it's 30 bucks on sale right now, uh, that you can read at your own pace and just sort of, again, it's like from one mom talking to another. And if you just want to like hear from other moms who. Are experiencing it or have the same questions like just join our community and just kind of drop in and ask questions.
Um, there's kind of something for everyone. And when we are, our real goal is to just meet moms where they're at.
[00:39:15] Lorilee Binstock: Amazing. Is there anything else that you would like to add? Gosh,
[00:39:22] Tracey Tee: um, I don't think so. I mean, I think for me, it's all about, uh, I would just, I would love to see a world where mothers give themselves permission.
To be happy, to be joyful, to be a woman who also happens to be a mom, to really sit with that sentence that you are a woman, you are a human being with a heart and a soul and a brain and dreams and, and talent and gifts. And you're also a mother, but you're not just a mother. Like you can be both. And it's.
It takes a lot of work to allow yourself to be both. And again, from where I sit in my small corner of the world, I believe that the mushrooms are these beautiful little beings of light helpers that are just sort of pushing your butt up over the fence, helping you do the work that you will ultimately do yourself.
I mean, Maria, Sabina, also a mother, the mother of this whole movement, you know, said it best, like you are the medicine, but you have to, You have to have an inclination that you are the medicine, you have to get to a space where you can trust that you're the medicine and that's the hard part. And that's where I think the mushrooms can help.
[00:40:43] Lorilee Binstock: Wow. Well, thank you so much for giving me your time today. I am so grateful for it and for the information and the wisdom that you shared. So thank you so much. My pleasure. Thank you. That was Tracey T., founder of Moms on Mushrooms. For more information and contact for Tracey, check out the show notes for links to her resources including her website.
Also October's issue of Authentic Insider is out. Check out Authentic Insider at traumasurvivorthriver. com. That's traumasurvivorthriver. com as well as past episodes of a Trauma Survivor Thrivers podcast. If you haven't already, please subscribe to my email list to get Authentic Insider magazine in your inbox monthly.
We will be back next week with episode 102, when I speak with Susan Justice, author of Children Who Dance in the Rain, when we discuss how to teach our children about privilege. You've been listening to a Trauma Survivor Thrivers podcast. I'm Lorelei Benstock. Thank you for being a part of the conversation.
Take care.
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